Thursday, June 4, 2009

Packer GM Weyenberg Ousted

In the most stunning corporate overthrow in TTFBA history, Kalec and Kalec Incorporated ousted founding Muncie Packer General Manager Chad Weyenberg during a pre-dawn board meeting today. Weyenberg issued a press release implying he was stepping down voluntarily but according to surveillance video and audio recordings obtained by DTC's Colossus UltraSuperComputer (now with FriendlyChip Technology!), he did it under threats that he would also lose his home and family if he did not cooperated

Financial transactions obtained by the Colussus Echelon internet communication filtering subpackage show that Kalec Sr's compensation package in his contract as coach of the Packers included significant shares of stock. As his ownership percentage increased to over 40%, Kalec convinced the aging, barely coherent Weyenberg, to hire on Mikey Kalec, presumbable as a jock strap washer.

However, unbeknownst to Weyenberg, BobBob Kalec actually hired Mikey as a consultant, planting him in the front office near Weyenberg's suite that these days is more like a hospital room with all the wires and IV tubes and plastic surgeons and Angelina Jolie lookalike nurses keeping him ticking.

Over the past season, Mikey (actual name Madoff Kalec) gathered knowledge about Packer management operations. Two days ago, Kalec Sr. and Madoff used that information to leverage Weyenberg to sign over 10% ownership to Madoffsky. A board meeting was immediately called and majority owners Kalec and Kalec ousted the ancient and senile yet wise and well loved long time owner of the Muncie Packers.






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